Category Archives: Manhood

A Step Past Hard

What if you went a step past hard in everything?

Your morning run. You say one mile will be hard. Go one mile and one step.

Your work. You have a long list to do. It looks hard. Do the list and one more thing.

Eating Right. You believe it is hard to avoid the ice cream. So avoid the ice cream and eat some broccoli.

Each of these are examples of a step past hard. If you go an extra step everyday on your run then pretty soon you will be going two miles.

If you avoid ice cream long enough and eat enough broccoli then you will be healthy. Well, healthier than you were before.

My point is, anything worth doing is on the other side of hard.

So step past hard every day and you will see some amazing things happen in your life.

I once thought about writing a book called A Step Past Hard. Two hundred pages of how to step past hard. But, in all honesty, that would be a waste of trees. You have everything here you need to reach your next goal.

  1. Define what hard is in respect to that goal.
  2. Go one step past hard.
  3. Repeat Every Day
  4. Reach the goal and then set the next one.

Have a great day as you step through hard.

In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day

Here are a few thought on overcoming the lions that you face today.

You should read the book.



Good morning welcome to thoughts from my office on this cold December Day It is a few days until Christmas but my thought isn’t about Christmas today. It’s about a book I’ve been reading. The book is called In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day by Mark Batterson. If you get a chance to find a copy of this pick it up. It’s challenging, it’s encouraging and I will share the main premise of the book with you today.

I picked it up at Mardels on the dollar discount rack and it laid on my shelf for about 3 weeks before I picked it up and started reading it. It has really helped me see some things in my life that I  have allowed to consume or control me. There are fears that I must overcome. A lot of this kind of fear causes us to stagnate and sit there.

So I want to share with you the premise of the whole book. It is based and second Samuel chapter 23 verse 20 Then Benaiah the son of Jehoiada, the son of a valiant of Kabzeel, who had done mighty deeds, killed the two sons of Ariel of Moab. He also went down and killed a lion in the middle of a pit on a snowy day.

Now I don’t know if you’ve ever read that before. Maybe you read through the Bible and read that verse. I’ve read through the Bible many times in the past and never really thought much about it But this man jumped into a pit with a lion on a snowy day and defeated the lion we are told. And then becomes the commander of King David’s army a significant achievement for him. This man is barely mentioned in a few verses of scripture and this whole book it is based on that verse or that’s the theme or the premise of the book.

It’s a great thought to think about today and specifically we talk about fears that we have. These fears that control us. When I  look in the eyes of a lion my response is to turn and run the opposite direction. But not this man. He looked at the lion and chased it down and defeated it. And sol there are lions in our lives today. There are lions in my life that I’m fearful of. That I’m scared of. That I’ve been actually running the opposite direction of and I’m sure you’re the same way as well. So this book, th is the scripture challenges us to look at lion in the eyes and chase it down. And he goes on to say in the book to say that you may be defeated. You will be defeated at times when you chase lions but those are times that you grow.  Those are times you become faithful and those are times that you begin the conquering of those fears. The overcoming of those fears and ultimately the point is that God has called us to do some tremendous things that were too scared of. And how we we don’t jump in the pit on a snowy day with a lion. Which is just crazy. That is three things stacked against you, a lion, in a pit for you can’t run away, and snow. It’s cold and you can’t walk very well you can get good traction all those things when you’re battling a lion.

So my question for you today what fears are you battling and what is it that you need to look in the eye, trust the Lord in it, and go forward in it.

No so often we talk about fear like you can overcome your fear on your own. But ultimately that’s not the truth the truth is that by God’s power, his grace, his mercy, he helps you walk through and into those fears. He helps you face lions and move forward. So I hope these words are encouraging for you today as the Lord has called us to some tremendous things as we step out and take advantage of that opportunity.

Be faithful to do what he has called us to do even when it’s hard. Even when it looks like a big giant lion. Let’s go do it today. Have a great day. God bless!

Consequences of A Pornified Culture – The Fall of Art Briles

Today it was announced that Art Briles will be fired as the head football coach at Baylor University. This comes after an external review found that the university failed to appropriately handle several allegations of sexual assault against Baylor University football players.

You can read the full article here that details some of the findings and further discusses other changes the university is making.

I am just an outsider looking on and have no other details than what has been provided through news reports over the last several months. With that being said I would like to make one observation. The major issue here is a failure to protect women on the campus of Baylor University. But this is not a problem isolated to Baylor University. This is a national issue.

This issue stems from a greater and yet underlying problem, the pornification of our culture. If statistics hold true then well over two thirds of the young men on the football team at Baylor, well any college football team for that matter, view pornography at least once a week. Statistics from Covenant Eyes, an internet and mobile accountability group, reveals this fact, “About 64-68% of young adult men and about 18% of women use porn at least once every week. Another 17% of men and another 30% of women use porn 1-2 times per month.”

Combine that with this statistic, “When hundreds of scenes were analyzed from the 50 top selling adult films, 88% of scenes contained acts of physical aggression, and 49% of scenes contained verbal aggression.” And now we have a recipe for male physical aggression toward women. Add to that the fact that Baylor University, for the sake of the program, failed to take action that would prevent future assaults from taking place and you have this environment that almost encourages this type of behavior.

Here is the recipe a little more precisely.

  1. Young men with unhindered (80-90% of pornography is accessed for free) access to pornography.
  2. 88% of top pornography videos teach these young men that sex is to be aggressive and abusive. Men are to take it by force.
  3. An environment to behave in this way with no fear of consequence.

The result, Baylor University football program over the last several years.

This saddens me to say, but if we continue down this path of unhindered access to pornography then this news story will become more common place. We will soon find that other programs across the country have been covering up and hiding many of the same problems.

Hopefully through this decisive action by Baylor University Board of Regents, other women across the country will come forward and other programs that compromise morality and ethics for the sake of winning ballgames will be brought down.

We can no longer ignore, hide, and laugh off porn use. It must be destroyed. It will be destroyed one man at a time.

When young men become real men and quit seeking temporary thrills and pleasures on the internet.

When young men become real men and protect women instead of abusing them.

When young men become real men who fight for truth, and ethics, and morals, and principles.

When young men quit being cowards all the while wearing the manhood label.

When young men become real men then we will see this industry fall.

Until then, expect this story to be more common. I hate that I say that.

I conclude with this writing from the tomb of an Anglican bishop found in the crypts of Westminster Abbey:

When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights and decided to change only my country.

But it, too, seemed immovable. As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.

And now as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realize: If I had only changed my self first, then by example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country and , who knows, I may have even changed my world. 

Who Is The Man Upstairs?

Last night, during his post game interview, Peyton Manning gave thanks to “the man upstairs” for the Denver win. The statement he made got me to thinking; who is this man upstairs?

Was he giving indirect thanks to Broncos General Manager John Elway? Maybe Elway’s office is upstairs above Manning’s (Do star quarterbacks have offices? Oh yeah, their office is the football field). No if that were true he would say something like this, “I would like to thank John Elway, the man upstairs, for putting together a great team this year.”

Was he thanking the Broncos ownership? No, if that were true he would have said something like this, “Thank you Pat Bowlen, the man upstairs for owning this team well.”

Or maybe Manning has a loft apartment over his home and he has someone living there.

Who could be living there?

Maybe it’s his uncle Johnny. No, that can’t be it. If that were the case he would have said something like this, “I would like to thank my uncle Johnny, the man who lives in our upstairs apartment, for this win. Plus uncle Johnny cooks me eggs every morning and that makes me strong.”

Maybe he has taken in a homeless man to live in his loft apartment. No, in that case he would have said, “I would like to thank the homeless man that we have taken in and who lives in our loft apartment. He is the man upstairs and he never gives up and I am inspired by that!”

No, no, I’ve got it. Manning was talking to one of his fans. Maybe one of his fans was in the upper deck at the Super Bowl and Manning was thanking him. This fan probably wrote him a really cool email and he was thanking him for the inspiration. No that can’t be it. If that were the case he would have said something like, “Thank you to my greatest fan, the man upstairs in the upper deck, who wrote me this really inspirational email this week and it helped me get through this game.”

It also could be that Manning rents out his loft apartment. He could have been saying, “Thanks to the man upstairs who always pays his rent on time. He helps me put food on the table for my kids.” No that probably isn’t what he means. He doesn’t need to rent that out to earn a living. In fact he rented himself out last night with the Budweiser statement he made right before he thanked the man upstairs. (He got paid to say that and please don’t believe otherwise.)

I could go on with these but I think you get the point. The phrase, “I want to give thanks to the man upstairs” is open to a lot of speculation.

I get it. This phrase is a cultural phrase that is used quite often to refer to God but I fear that it is too broad. It is true that Manning could have made no reference to God at all. But I also believe it has become a cultural norm to soften what one really believes when in the public spotlight.

Can we get to a place where one can have convictions and speak them with boldness? I hope so. I pray so.

We need faithful men and women who are guided by their convictions and their convictions guide their words. We need men and women who are willing to say, “I want to thank the Lord Jesus Christ for gifting me with the ability to play this game and lift high His name.”

That is an honest statement. That is a clear statement. That statement is not open to silly speculation.

Let us be clear in our convictions. Let us be clear in our use of language.

A lost world needs us to do that.






Which Book Cover Should I Use?

Good Monday morning everyone! I hope you had a great weekend! I know that I did. Things are moving along smoothly on the 38 Day Plunge.

Today, I need your help.

I have created several book covers and I need help selecting which one is best.

Would you help me pick one?

In this post I have included 4 possible book covers. Each cover is labeled with a number. Would you pick your favorite one and then leave a comment with the number of your selection. I would appreciate it greatly!

Synopsis of the book. This book is written to teach parents the problems that too much screen time poses to young men and then provide solutions for parents to use to help their young man grow into a real men in the real world.

So, which one should I use?

Book Cover 1


Book Cover 2


 Book Cover 3


 Book Cover 4


Thank you so much for your help!

Wanted: A Man To Lead

This is a poem that I found during my research for the book I am writing. I could not find the date when it was published and the author is unknown, but this poem is true today as it was when it was written. We need men to lead! Men, our families are looking to us to lead. Are we doing a good job? What do you think?


There isn’t a boy but wants to grow

Manly and true at heart,

And every lad would like to know

The secrets we can impart.

He doesn’t want to slack or shirk–

Oh, haven’t you heard him plead?

He’ll follow a man at play or work

If only the man will lead.

Where are the men to lead today,

Sparing an hour or two?

Teaching the boy the game to play

Just as a man should do?

Village & slums are calling— “Come,

Here are the boys!” Indeed,

Who can tell what they might become,

If only the man would lead.

Where are the men to lend a hand?

Echo it far & wide–

Men who will rise in every land,

Bridging the “Great Divide.”

Nation & flag & tongue unite

Joining each class & creed.

Here are the boys who would do right–

But where are the men to lead?

                                                    –Author Unknown